The HR Paradox: Why Do We Preach Collaboration but Hesitate to Help Our Own?

 A while ago, I was added to a WhatsApp HR networking group (one amongst many such…)

The description read:

"A place for HR professionals to connect, share knowledge, and help each other in career growth."

It sounded great—until I noticed something interesting.

·         The group was flooded with job postings—but mostly for junior and mid-level HR roles.

·         Lots of theory, articles, and “gyaan”—but very little real career support.

·         When a senior HR professional needed a role, suddenly, the group turned silent.

Because helping junior professionals is easy—it costs nothing. But recommending or referring a fellow senior HR leader? That’s where things get tricky.

The Unspoken Reality: HR’s Own Insecurities

HR professionals are expected to advocate for employees, culture-builders, and champions of fairness—but ironically, many fail to extend the same principles to their peers.

Why? A few hard truths:

Fear of Competition:

• “What if I recommend someone and they outshine me?”
• The corporate world is unforgiving, and HR professionals—who should be fostering collaboration—sometimes fall into the same scarcity mindset that plagues other functions.

The “Self-Branding” Syndrome:

• Many senior HR professionals create LinkedIn groups, WhatsApp forums, and communities—but often, these serve more as personal branding tools rather than true networking hubs.
• Real help is rare. Connections are built, but opportunities aren’t shared.

Selective Networking:

• If a mid-level HR professional needs a referral, some help is offered.
• But if an HR leader with 20+ years of experience is out of a job, suddenly, doors close.
• It’s an unspoken rule—helping juniors is easy; helping equals is “risky.”

The Harsh Reality of HR’s Internal Divide

HR should be a community that lifts each other up, but in reality, we often see:

❌ Scarcity Mindset – “There are only so many top HR roles, and if I help others, I reduce my own opportunities.”
❌ Power Hoarding – Some senior HR leaders prefer to maintain their influence rather than create a strong talent pipeline.
❌ The ‘Struggle’ Justification – "I had to work my way up without any help. Why should I make it easier for someone else?"
❌ Fear of Being Replaced – "If I mentor someone too well, they might take my job one day."
❌ HR Burnout & Prioritization – “I spend my whole day solving people’s problems. Do I really have time to mentor others?”

This is not a generalization—many incredible, selfless HR leaders actively mentor, guide, and uplift fellow professionals.
But, the reality is that HR isn’t always the close-knit support system it should be.

A Story We’ve All Seen

Picture this:

A Senior HR Director loses a job due to a restructuring. He/she reaches out to fellow HR leaders—people they have worked with for decades.

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Silence.

Months go by, and when they finally land a new job, suddenly their inbox is full again—because now, they’re in a position to help others.

If you’ve worked in HR long enough, you’ve seen or experienced this firsthand.

And that’s the problem.

 How Can We Change This?

It starts with shifting the HR mindset from scarcity to abundance.

✅ HR Leaders Must Lead By Example

• If we, as HR professionals, preach collaboration and employee well-being, we must extend that same courtesy to our own.
• Recommending a qualified HR leader does not make you less valuable—it strengthens your network.

✅ Real Networking Over Vanity Metrics

• Having 10,000 followers on LinkedIn doesn’t make you a real connector.
• Actively helping, referring, and recommending makes you one.

✅ Helping Seniors is Just as Important as Helping Juniors

• Your peer today might be your hiring manager tomorrow.
• HR professionals must support each other—because time changes for everyone.

The Need for Better Communication: Closing the Loop in Recruitment

One of the simplest yet most overlooked aspects of professionalism in HR—especially in recruitment—is communication. Ghosting candidates—whether they are **junior, mid-level, or senior professionals—is not just unprofessional; it actively damages the reputation of both the recruiter and the company they represent.

A simple follow-up, even if it’s a rejection, is better than silence.
Candidates remember how they were treated—today’s rejected applicant could be tomorrow’s potential client, partner, or even hiring manager.

Recruiters often argue that they are overwhelmed with applications, but closing the loop isn't about writing lengthy emails—it’s about respect. A two-line update can make a world of difference.

If we, as HR professionals, expect employees to bring their best selves to work, shouldn’t we model the same level of integrity and courtesy in how we engage with candidates?

Let’s commit to building a profession that values respect, transparency, and human connection—not just in policies, but in real actions.

We teach companies about fairness, inclusion, and collaboration. It’s time to practice it within our own profession.

 Final Thoughts: HR Needs to Lift HR

We always talk about creating a great employee experience, but what about creating a great experience for HR professionals themselves?

If HR leaders truly want to leave a legacy, it won’t be through just policies and processes—it will be through the people they mentor, uplift, and support.

HR shouldn’t be a lonely profession—it should be a thriving community.
And that starts with senior HR leaders making a conscious effort to help the next generation.

To all HR professionals reading this—let’s start making real connections, not just social ones.

What’s your take? Have you seen this happen? Let us discuss ...

 

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